Skeletons buried under a boatload of lancets. Here is why…
I can’t throw any extra diabetic supplies out. There was a time when I was uninsured and had to get creative in order to manage my diabetes. I think I hold on to extras in case I ever find myself in that position again. I also give away my extras when I know someone is in need. Diabetic supplies are also very costly so I just can’t bring myself to get rid of them. The supply I have the most of is lancets. This is because I do not change mine every time I check my blood sugars (Healthcare professionals and Parents please ignore the previous statement).
The skeletons buried beneath the lancets are named guilty, more guilty and most guilty. They have been buried for years. I have been working very hard to get rid of them but they are buried deeply. I think they stay because I can’t let go. The guilt I am speaking of comes from not taking better control of my diabetes. Once I get more comfortable with blogging I will post more about this. I do not have a problem speaking about this. In fact, the more people I meet with complications, the more I learn that I am not alone. I think when you have diabetes, guilt is an easy emotion to feel. It shouldn’t be. I know this but no matter how much my heart and brain debates this, my heart wins. I feel hopeful though. This past year I have worked a lot on understanding where this emotion and these skeletons originated from. The more I understand, the more I can deal with them and start to let go. I need to let go and clear them out so I can make room for all of the good things diabetes and life has given me.
Maybe if I changed my lancets more often the skeletons wouldn’t be buried so deeply.